*sings*
Put a gun in my hand and pretend you don’t care~!!

So….been a crazy past few…..days…weeks…months…..year…..lifetime…..I guess I’ll always be saying things like that. ^__^;; It’s not a bad thing. :)

Kitty Cat Seven from Neko Machi. Just a random thing. :3 Flexing long unused muscle memory. *crampcramp*
CAN YOU TELL I HAVE CATS~??~?!?!?!?! Freakin’ hairs get EVERYWHERE. D:<

A bunch of scribbles here, for no reason. (FAIL~!). Was actually fighting a panic attack while doing this. *LOL* Silly things. Ohhhh, I can’t wait until it gets warmer….and I can run around in tank-tops and undies again. *sigh* I miss you sunlight~!!

A long while back, I bought a small note at the Kinokuniya stationary store (I’m an absolute whore for stationary and such) simply for the engrish on the cover. It TOTALLY and perfectly sums up my “being.”

Even if my days are crazy and erratic and all over the place, they’re still so amazing and I’m glad to be alive and living the life I am (even if I do complain too much). :P No matter how bad things get, it’s always a comfort to know that I have good people behind me and a bright future ahead of me. *squish*

I haven’t used said note until recently; what better chance than to properly document RoseMarie’s story (so that I don’t forget it-because it’s important to me). So……Rosie~! <3

And OMG look who’s getting SOO SOOOOO big~!! (it’s because he eats too damn much~!!). My Kumo-momomomomomoo. :3~~~~
Yay random~!!!

All of my 005 microns died. ^__^;; I don’t feel like finishing, anyways.

Of course, Kurumi belongs to Ewen. Sorry for messing up your muse, dear. TT^TT

I like drawing girls. I like drawing nekkid girls. It makes me sad when people say things like it’s wrong or dirty or pervy or something along those lines. I’m not getting any sexual gratification out of it, if someone else happens to, then that’s great~!!!, but I do not. It’s just fun. Curves are fun…unlike straight lines (like the above pic which bored me to tears). The human body is fun. Female or male, doesn’t matter.

Boobs are the best~!!! (and I’m glad mine are big). Butts are great, too~! So please be proud of your body, girlies. You guys out there, too~!!! :D If you take the time to study the human machine, you’ll see that it’s a crazy wonderful piece of craftsmanship that should be loved and cared for no matter what it looks like. Love yourself dammit~!! XD And….and…..and don’t let anybody else fuck with your own image of yourself. From stick thin photoshopped heroine chic boy girls on the runway, to super cute chub chub……y’know….everyone~!!! So much fun~!! LOVE LOVE LOOOOOOOVE~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
*rant*

Haha. Not really having anything to do with artwork at all, but have any of you guys seen the blog 1000 Awesome Things? Read through it. It really will make your day a little more awesome; it’s about all the little things that we should be taking a little more time for.

Also, I haven’t heard this song in years, and I totally forgot how happy it makes me. Like…..makes me want to dance in the streets kind of happy. (actually, when I used to walk to work very early in the morning, I would do just that~! hahah).
Plus, I’m going to marry Suga someday. I really am. (or at least chain him up with the rest of my harem in my closet and make him sing to me at will. LOOOVE his voice. Mwaaaahahahhahahahahahahahahhah~!!!)
*cackle*

*lol* Was this post erratic enough? ^__^;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;

Caught yet another cold this past week. That’s after already being sick two weeks before. :P I should go live in a bubble~! ^__^;;;;;;; But it’s past now, so lets hope I don’t get sick again.

I think The Universe is conspiring to have me not have a sketchbook; the past few I’ve had have either been inadequate to draw on, got lots to the ether, or got damaged somehow (I’m *REALLY* picky about the paper I draw on, heheh). So in the meantime, until I can get another, I’ve been drawing on random scraps of paper (my really expensive paper *SOB*). The two on the left are Oliver and Aston (formerly named “girl” and “boy” in a post from earlier last year), from a short story that I really want to draw, but can’t get to look the way I want it to….

….do you ever have that problem? You see something so very clearly in your head, but when you sit down to get it out, you can’t execute it AT ALL. ^__^;;;;;;;

To the right is Prince, a friend of RoseMarie’s, who needs a new character design…which is what happened there. I’m not happy with it at all.

90second gesture drawings. Ahahaha, I got so bad at this~!!! (I wasn’t very good to begin with). But practicing these things is very fun-however much I wish PoseManiacs had, y’know, SKIN on its models. :3

Unfortunately, as I type this, the sunlight is going away. *sniffle*

Hmm…I changed to my own Wordpress theme recently for this blog. …I think I might take it apart again to see what I can do with it. Hmmmm……

Spinning around in circles, you’re bound to get somewhere, right? ….RIGHT? O__O;;;

Art? What art? I have NO idea what you’re talking about. :)

*LITERALLY goes back to the drawing board*

*sob*

So I did that meme that’s going around DeviantArt right now; that one about showing the improvement you’ve made through your arts over the years. *sigh*

My immediate thought after this was to get down on myself for not having ANY tangible improvement whatsoever. >___>;;; But dear Usaku brought up the point that sometimes improvement doesn’t come always from improvement, but refinement. I mean, from when I first started using them, I’ve learned a ton of crazy tricks and ways to handle markers; and that was something that came from trying to refine my process and style. I wanted to make pretty things with a certain medium. And so I taught myself how. In that sense, I guess there was improvement.

But if the last year has given me anything at all, it’s the realization that being stuck to one certain thing for any given time may give you refinement in it, perhaps even mastery of it (if such a thing is possible), but it also takes away from the whole. You lose skills, and others atrophy. You miss out on experiencing what other things have to offer………I wonder if this makes any sense. (Oh well, it’s my blog, I’ll babble if I want to, haha).

Now, this isn’t to go against that line of thought of doing one thing and doing it was well as possible~!!

But…..I…..need to keep on trying different things. I’m SO frustrated by my own status-quo. Time to break it down and start anew, I guess. YAY~!!! XD

Uhm….*doesn’t know what to say*

Grace.  RoseMarie’s ‘partner in crime,’ so to speak.  Trying to nail down a solid design for him for…….things.  :P

Azusa.  From a project I would have really loved to have started by now, but things are still up in the air crazy…and I’d rather start it when I 1.) have a stable place (OF MY OWN) to live, and 2.) I know what large future projects I’m going to have.

RoseMarie.  Just some random expressions…for the same reason I drew Grace.  Just trying to get more of a handle on the way she emotes. :P

The other day I got a message from a friend saying to check my mail for various things.  The following is kindof what happened…

I was really like OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG OMFG all over the place~!!!  And here’s what he gave me for Christmas:

It’s of course, RoseMarie.  ^__^;;;;;  As well as Ewen’s cute as heck bunny mascot Kurumi and Suichi’s awesome awesome needs to be be-decked in ribbons a little more often Melanie.  It was SOOOOO AWESOME to see these three together~!!!  So thank you SO MUCH to Ewen and to Sue-chan for the amazing art.  I die~!!! XD~~~

Hmm, yay.  So I finally got around to getting this thing back in working order (turns out I forgot to pay for my hosting service.  HAHA.  That’s so like me).  Sorry for the absence.  TT__TT

These are just a couple WIP shots of a not so particular pic I tried to do to remind myself that I still like drawing.  :P

Yeah yeah phone-cam qualityyyyyyy~~~~*sings*

***

I’ve taken the past month and a half or so off from freelancing and such and really from drawing in general.  Why?  One, because I’ve been flippin’ out of my mind busy/stressed (ahahah, no surprises there); lots of personal things getting screwed up.  And two, I just needed the break.  Nothing wrong with that, right?  Well, no, I hope not, save for that I haven’t had any other real income coming in.  *dies*
Anyways, the break I took caused me to look at a few things in a fresh light.  Like, y’know, what I want to do with all this freelance mess.  >__>;;;  I can easily say, from here on, I’ll be taking on and searching for work a lot differently. :P If I even decide to take on work again…Wooooo~~~~~

As well, stylistically, I still don’t know what I want, or where to go.  There’s SO many things I want to try, but I feel stuck with all my old bad habits (like pre-artschool habits, ahhh)-and if you know anything about drawing, old habits are H A R D to break. *sigh*  But even when I do try to branch out, I just feel flat out intimidated.  It’s not a real fear, per se, but more like…well, I don’t know, like I’m stading in my own way…..?  I don’t know. :3

I probably won’t be going to many conventions any more-and the ones I *do* go to will have very specific reasons in mind.  Having skipped the con exhibition scene for a couple years now, I’ve never felt better in that decision, however much others say ‘wtf.’   I’m just not into selling random merchandise or on the spot commissions.

Bwahahaha, I don’t know.  I wonder if it’s also just life being inside out/upside down that’s got me all confused artistically.  Uhm, yeah.  I don’t know what I’m talking about (as if I ever do~!).

Happy New Year’s, y’all.  :D  Let’s all please make 2010 awesome and….like…productive….and…..stuff. X3

(unrelated drawings)
Not knowing what to say about this. :> Feeling kind of weak, kind of sleepy. And very very cold. 6 more days till I can end this madness~!!! Yay. And begin madness anew. :D

BRING. IT. ON. ~!!!!

So many different things going on lately that it’s hard to keep up with just plain doodling. Eek. (It’s actually been rather hard to keep up with work and stuff, too). Buubuuuu. So here’s some randomness-in stolen times that I had to myself.

RoseMarie Tobias and Grace. Feels like forever since I’ve drawn either of them. TTwTT

Kitty and Kim from NekoMachi, a 3-times weekly webcomic of NekoEwen’s that I’m now illustrating.

I’m hoping to have different sorts of things to post in the near future as other projects get ready to go. *sigh* I also have a boatload of art to post over at my Deviant Art page. Will probably have to open a few different types of commissions to help out with this craziness that decided to pop up recently (which SUCKS because I really dislike to advertise such things). But there’s lots of things coming….as time, energy (which I have NONE of), and resources (another thing I’m running very low on) allow.

Let’s all hope I can stay sane in the meantime. ^__^;; *passes out the umbrellas*

Nyaaa. ‘Nother 30second scribble.

Geh. I am so completely undeserving of the many amazing people who (still) support me. Buuuu~~~! I heart you guys. :D
Taking a quick break to get some things done so that I can move on to other…things. :P

…….it feels like I am trying to digest a bunch of dull knives. TT3TT